DaGoddess is talking about something totally disgusting. Madonna getting pregnant at 45. First I didn’t realize she was that old and I’m sure her plastic surgeon gets rave reviews and a ton of money for that.Madonna is insane. But then again, with all the people she can afford to hire to raise them, it’s not like she’ll have to put forth much time and effort. Still I can not imagine a mother in her 60′s having a child graduating from high school. My Grandmother was only 54 when I graduated.I wonder how she’s getting rid of the stretch marks? PhotoShop?

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Well it’s 4:30 in the morning. I’ve slept very little tonight, ummm..this morning. Today I have a budget review at 3:30 this afternoon. This happens once a year and all the corporate yahoos fly in, rent a conference room at one of hotels on airport row.Last year, this happened and I wasn’t invited, by my boss. I learned very loudly the next day I was supposed to be there. So this year I am mandated to be there. Which is fine, I took some damn serious cuts last year that I’m still pissed off about.I was looking forward to today, finally a chance to voice my opinion on quality healthcare vs financial gain. Yesterday I was pretty much told to keep my mouth shut. After contemplating this for about 5 seconds, I told my boss. Fine, I’ll not offer any opinions, but if I’m asked I won’t speak anything less than the truth. This didn’t make her happy, but what could she say.I was given some bogus response that anything negative I say will reflect on my regional director. Well my regional director is a very nice, smart woman. I would not want to reflect negatively on her…but in the same aspect, she’s had a year to ask me what I think before this meeting. She hasn’t.If I have to take anymore cuts in staffing, I have to resign. As far as I’m concerned I’m staffing now where I am teetering on the border between safe and unsafe levels. If myself and my managers didn’t put in the long hours we do, this building wouldn’t make it. We would be in the survey cycle of hell.One more thing I want to rant about…before these cuts, our building made more above the projected gain than any facility in their organization. That’s over 300 facilities. We are still making a shitload of money…although not as much over the projected gain this year because of the cuts. Does this make sense?When you are talking Medicare reimbursement, the higher the acuity of patient care needs the higher the reimbursement. Say the difference of $200 per day to $400+ a day. Now I won’t admit many patients with higher levels of care because of staffing. We run 30-40 Medicare patients per day. Do the math.That’s right…a loss of close to 200,000 per month because I admit easier patients, or even worse, let my beds sit empty. Then the numbers get staggering. As of this morning, I have 8 empty beds that I could fill with higher acuity patients, but I’m letting them sit. Waiting for easier patients. Do that math at $400/day. I could add a shitload of people for that money and still come out ahead. Way ahead.Now I could probably get fired if the wrong person read this. Maybe I will today if someone ASKS me what I’m doing. After all it is my license on that wall. Not theirs. Something goes wrong, I go to jail, they get a $10,000 fine. Chump change to them.I could go on and on…but I won’t. Corporate people really are too fucking stupid for words.

Well I just got home from my budget meeting. I was there 4 hours. I feel like I just drove 200 miles northbound on the southbound expressway.

Corporate yahoos are crazy.

I don’t know if I can do this conversation justice in writing but one of the conversations:

Me: I want to hire a physical therapy assistant for my restorative program.

Yahoo: You can’t, a nurse has to head restorative.

Me: I head restorative.

Yahoo: So you are the restorative nurse there?

Me: No, I’m the DON, I head the restorative program.

Yahoo: You can’t do that. A nurse has to do the progress notes.

Me: I do that.

Yahoo: Well a physical therapy assistant has to be under a physical therapist.

Me: I have 2.

Yahoo: Well a physical therapy assistant can not do hands on.

(Hello?)

Me: Yes they can.

Yahoo: Well there is no code for that in the computer.

Me:

Then the yahoo left the room. My boss turned to me and says “Dawn, never argue reality with a concept person. They don’t get it.”

Well color me fucked up.

In one of my commutes to and from work this week I heard on the radio that September 18 was the anniversary of Jimi Hendrix’s death.I’m not sure where he ended up on the Rolling Stone’s list of greatest guitar players. Sure, I could do some research but he’s #1 on my list that’s all that matters. He was THE Man.I played the piano for years, I love piano music, pretty isn’t it? Guitars speak, they touch, they make love, it can make you sad, make you happy, in fact it touches my soul.Before I was even a teen I found Jimi. Jimi scared me as much as he fascinated me, literally he did. I should of been craving to hear the Monkeys like my friends. No, Jimi opened a world for a pre-teen that was dark, exciting and very different. I think it scared my mother more.

The Official Jimi Hendrix Website

states the week of September 28, PBS will have a week long series by Martin Scorsese on “The Blues” which will include Jimi. I’m not going to miss that one, which is scheduled to air October 2.

Steve at Little Tiny Lies has a kidney stone. My Grandmother in her lifetime had a couple of those and she says it’s very comparable to being in labor.I’m sure that will give Steve something to ponder as he prepares to deliver. I hope it passes quickly and he’s back to his blogging. Although the opiates are a good plus….you don’t get that in labor.My ex-husband had a couple of bouts with kidney stones. The very first was a night I will never forget.We had been dating about a month and he invited me over to cook for him. Well my cooking skills pretty much consisted of scrambling eggs and peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, but I’m a woman, I figured I could do this.So the menu was meatloaf, macaroni and cheese and some vegetable which now slips my mind. It wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be, I only had to call my Grandma twice during preparation.It actually didn’t come out too bad. Edible, coulda been better but what the hell. So after we cleaned up the kitchen, grabbed a couple of beers and went to watch some TV. Should of been a clue of the next twenty years of my life…but I was young and dumb.After about 30 minutes he gets up without saying anything and heads into the bathroom. In about 5 minutes I hear this loud retching starting…and it just keeps on going. Oh shit. I am actually at this time thinking somehow I food poisoned him. The retching continues until I hear a loud thud in the bathroom and then a huge groan.I actually ran to the bathroom and there he was laying on the floor doubled up holding his stomach. This is not a good thing. Now that I think of it, maybe it should of been his clue for what was in store for the next 20 years…but I digress.I ask him if he wants me to call an ambulance but since we are 30 minutes from the nearest town, I am thinking he could be dead by then. The man was green.He moans “no, give me a minute”. Uh huh.

I go call Grandma and ask what should I do for food poisoning. She asks me if I’m sick and I assure her I feel fine. So she assures me it probably wasn’t my food. So I head back to the bathroom deciding maybe I could figure this out since I’m in my first year of nurse’s training.

Now he says “get me to a hospital”. Ok, so much for nursing skills but I can drive a car. As you can imagine the drive was horrible…way too much moaning and retching.Within an hour of arriving at the ER he was diagnosed with renal calculi aka kidney stones. ER’s are much different in Iowa, you actually get seen the same day.Twenty years later I wish it had been food poisoning. Again…I’m digressing.

Becareful all, Velociman is worshipping strange gods again. Shit, anything could happen now.

LittleA gets his donuts at Hooters.

Death is looking for someone’s mother.

I’m hoping Daria has time to post that recipe for vodka popsicles after the new do.

Gennie is offering free MT Blogs. Yes, you can get off of blogspot. Follow that link!

Geoffrey is wondering if the nut falls far from the tree. Umm…Geoffrey? No.

Tony just had to share this giant rodent thang with us. I honestly think I could of gone the rest of my life without have knowing this.

Steve at Little Tiny Lies makes a good case for idiot warning labels, and maybe we need an idiot warning alert for hurricanes?

Get your Allah mugs, T-shirts and bears here. I really, really think I must have a mug. Allah just entertains the shit out of me. Thank you.

Mala is looking for advice to give friends. Here’s what I’d tell them: Are you fucking nuts? Get a clue! This is child’s play. Run!

Dax talks about the sport of deer hunting. Well Dax would you be surprised that some of us just happen to get their first kill by wandering around in the woods with a bottle of blackberry brandy? Remembering “Do. Not. Shoot. At. Orange.” I have matured, I can assure you. Now I would love to have some venison tenderloin smothered in mushroom gravy. Oh yeah.